Three years after the devastating attack on Simchat Torah in 2023, bereaved parents are confronting the unbearable weight of their final moments with their children—conversations that, in retrospect, they now recognize as their last. While the children seemed to understand the gravity of their situation, their parents struggle to process the horror, caught between shock and the cruel reality of what happened.
One parent recalls a particularly anguished moment: her daughter called out, “Mom, they’re shooting,” but in her distress and disbelief, she attempted to calm the girl rather than comprehend the catastrophic unfolding around them. The parent now lives with a consuming regret: “Ten minutes after that call, my son was killed. I’m the most sorry I’ve ever been in my life—I wish I had simply gotten in the car and driven.” These hauntings reveal the psychological toll that October 7 continues to exact on families who lost loved ones in the attack.
Understanding the Simchat Torah Massacre
On October 7, 2023, Hamas and allied militant groups launched a coordinated assault on Israel that killed approximately 1,200 people and left hundreds more missing or held hostage. The attack targeted a diverse range of locations, including military bases, kibbutzim, and civilian gatherings. Simchat Torah, one of Judaism’s most joyous holidays celebrating the completion and recommencement of Torah reading, was being observed across Israel when the violence erupted. Communities and families celebrating this sacred occasion became targets, and the massacre at celebrations and public gatherings that day became emblematic of the attack’s indiscriminate brutality.
The Psychological Aftermath of Lost Moments
These testimonies underscore a particular form of trauma experienced by families of the victims. Beyond the fact of their loss, parents and relatives are forced to relive their final interactions with their loved ones, often recognizing in retrospect how they failed to grasp what was happening in real time. Phone calls that lasted seconds, conversations cut short by violence, and words exchanged in confusion rather than clarity—these moments now become subjects of agonizing reexamination. Mental health professionals working with bereaved families have noted that survivors often fixate on “what could have been said” or “what I should have done,” a form of survivor guilt that compounds the primary trauma of loss.
The emergence of recordings and transcripts of these final conversations has become both a memorial practice and a psychological burden. Some families have found meaning in preserving and sharing these voices, ensuring their loved ones are remembered not just as victims but as individuals with their last words documented. Others find the repeated listening to these recordings retraumatizing, forcing them to relive the moments of powerlessness they experienced on that day.
Three Years of Struggle
In the three years since October 7, Israel has experienced significant political upheaval, military conflict, and humanitarian challenges stemming from the attack and its aftermath. The country launched extensive military operations in Gaza, aimed at eliminating Hamas leadership and infrastructure. Meanwhile, families of the October 7 victims have navigated not only personal grief but also broader national conversations about security, accountability, and justice. Some have become vocal advocates for hostage releases or investigations into security failures that preceded the attack; others have sought privacy while processing their loss.
The psychological impact has been profound and long-lasting. Survivor guilt, the weight of unanswered questions, and the absence of closure for families whose relatives remain missing have all contributed to a mental health crisis affecting thousands of Israelis. Support organizations dedicated to October 7 families have reported overwhelming demand for counseling and therapeutic services.
What Lies Ahead
As Israel continues to reckon with October 7’s legacy, these testimonies from parents serve as a reminder that the attack’s ripple effects extend far beyond immediate casualties. The psychological and emotional trauma—marked by haunting questions about final moments and roads not taken—will likely persist for years. National commemorations, memorials, and ongoing investigations into security failures during the attack remain central to Israel’s public discourse, even as political divisions over how to address Hamas and manage regional security continue to deepen.
Source: Ynet — Translated and expanded by Israel Daily Journal
